Wonderwall

Its a typicall wednesday night now. I have nothing to do, im sitting around doing just what i want and then it hits me why dont i get out this pen and paper and take down a nothe. Or why dont i just get out a color pencil and right you don somehting so here goes. YOu always told me how i could be myself and how i wouls never have to change to [lease you, and i was dumb enough to believe you, now im just sitting out on my own not worrying who is looking down at me. I can remember the first time you told me to get out, how you rip my clothes and said im done as i walked out the door. Or when i told you that i didnt want anything more than to just see your face and you said fuck no. Excuse my language but i have to give the context. If you dont like the way im about to write then i suggest you just stop reading right about now because im not going to take it easy on you or take a break in what i wrte to make it fit into you way of wrighting. i am who i am and my style is my style you can hate it or you can love it i dont care either way, wont hurt my felling. Tell me im a terrible writers you think that is going to hurt my feelings i dont have that feeling anymore after you came in and rip it out of my clothers out of my mind when i told you that i didnt want anything else to do with you you came back you took a look into my soul and you found the deepest darkest secrets that i thought i would never sahare and you bleted them out of my mouth like i had a gun to my headd. You told me that you would take it to your grave but i never kdid much believe you now im out here on my own and you dont even see me anymore. Why did you twist my life why did the truth just seem to come out when i was with you. Was it vecause i knew who you were or waas it all just a game that we were playing just trying to make that guape like out boy Mac Miller. Know whne i say things like this i dont much know why or how i got to this place but i know im listening to my favorite music through my headphones and all i can think about it the times we would cruise down the interstae in you Camaro or the days that we spend out in brighton just living the life. Im still going to come out and build that draw bridge from you front door to the sycimore tree in the front yard it the perfect spot for an awesome tree house. Ill never forgot my 40th birthday we all spent out there at your place, it was the most expensive birthday present i have ever bought for all of us only put me back 350 bucks but we had the most amazing day ever. These days just seem to come and go liek the memories I have never realy lost. I can relive the drive we had into pleasant hope when i had no reason in driving.
Now im going to change the subject just like the days when i wasnt out on the streets i hait up everyone i knew i tried to get eveyrthing i could i was just living for the day i never knew there was people out there who cared for me or a group that would take me in i just rean my life like it was out there doing nothing right or that there were people that told me they were proud of me and now im missing out the time that i should be craishing but i just need somehting to keep me striaght it just like the booze that is on y couter top or the bottle of whiskey that lives beside my night stand. I just got nothing figured out all that i have figured out is that i have nothing figured out. So what im going to do is run this life im going to show you that i never did need you and the only thing that you did was hold me back like the life was driving away from me like a gazelle when i leaps across the priare and tries to escape the grasp of the Cheetah and only the strong will survive if  you stubble or if you are weak you will always be capature and your mistakes willnever be forgot you will be forgot just do what you do and make that rush make who you are. I love you and i never will leave you.
Billbaords are out there, they taunt you as you drive down the interstate all they want form you is to just take a time out of you busy life and try something they have to offer you. Its not much different than something like a commercial or liek a radio ad they all just come out and shove it in your face like they  have nothing better to do then to just say buy me. Im going to go in a little more positve state here, imagine if you would that you are living on top of a billboard what would you means of life be. Would you even worry about a blanket or do you think someone would be afraid of the dark. I mean i only say they would be afraid of the dark would be if one of those super briht spotlight were to burn out and then you might be able to get some sleep . Now i guress it would really depend on what kind of billboard you lived on if it would be cool or not, I mean in my personal experience if i was living on a billboard because i was an alcholic and i was trying to get better but was forced to get on a sign that was all about crown royal or something like that i would probably hate it and my fate would come from a short fall off the top of the railing because i couldnt take it that long.